We’re about to round the 1/3 mark of the season, and the uniform weeks keep getting better. While this weekend is sure to deliver, tonight’s matchup is - to put it nicely - forgettable. Divisional rivalries are usually appointment television, but this one is as one sided as it gets. In fact, the last time the Broncos beat the Chiefs was in 2015 . . . 16 matchups ago.

Ladies and gentlemen, the Fifteen Straight Bowl!

A quick note on methodology.

As always, I’m analyzing every NFL uniform matchup and picking a winner against the spread based on who dresses best. And just because a team is ranked higher in the Uniform Wardrobe Power Rankings doesn’t mean it will automatically win the uniform matchup. It’s what you wear in the instant matchup that counts.

Looking back at Week 5.

Woof. Our losing ways continued. 4-9-1 on the week. And 35-40-3 on the season. No place to go but up.

Thursday Night Football Uniform Matchup.

As noted above, let’s call a spade a spade. Broncos at Chiefs is kind of a dud - aesthetically and otherwise. The Broncos are overdue for a redesign while the Chiefs should never change a thing. Kansas City in a no brainer.

It’s hard to comprehend losing 15 in a row to a division rival.* That level of one-sidedness seeps into the brain, and it’s even harder to comprehend the streak ending here. The Chiefs are superior to the Broncos in every facet of the game. Coaching. Offense. Defense. Special Teams. And don’t even get me started on the General Manager.** We still haven’t seen a Patrick Mahomes nuclear game this season. And there’s no better time than against a team that has thrown in the towel and is looking ahead to a trade deadline fire sale. Especially when said team is dead last in defensive expected points and gave up 70 points in a game three weeks ago. We should be in for a rout. In the immortal words of Russell Wilson, let’s ride.

*Not only have the Broncos lost 15 in a row to the Chiefs, they haven’t beaten Kansas City without Peyton Manning under center in over 10 years. The Sheriff went 7-1 against the Chiefs during his tenure in Denver, and he isn’t walking through the door to save the day in this one.

**Has any GM in NFL history had a worse tenure than George Paton?

The Pick: Chiefs -10.5

NOTE - Both teams have yet to reveal their choice of pants.

Club SDR - Week 6 Player Props.

The Week 5 games may not have treated us well, but our Single Digit Revolutionaries had a solid showing. 2-1 on the week. And 8-7 on the year. Let’s keep stacking.

Jerick McKinnon - Over 13.5 Receiving Yards

McKinnon has been relatively quiet coming off the best season of his career. But he’s cleared the number in every game this season where he has at least two catches. Fortunately for us, the Broncos are giving up the seventh most receptions per game (6.3) to opposing running backs. And I think McKinnon goes for his best receiving game of the season.

Zay Flowers - Over 55.5 Receiving Yards

Flowers has been a revelation this season and is already looking like the WR1 of the Ravens. He’s averaging 63 yards per game and next up are the Titans, who happen to be giving up the fifth most receiving yards per game to opposing receivers. As porous as the pass defense is, the Tennessee run defense is a Top 3 unit and should give the Ravens fits up front. So look for Todd Monken to have Lamar air it out and pepper Flowers with targets.

Matthew Stafford - Over 271.5 Passing Yards

Stafford and the Rams passing offense have been one of the most enjoyable stories this season. And the scrappy, no-name Cardinals defense has seemingly turned back into a pumpkin - giving up an average of 307 passing yards to Joe Burrow, Brock Purdy, and Daniel Jones. And if you remove last week’s outlier performance against the Eagles, Stafford has been averaging 307 passing yards himself. I like those trends to hold.

The Gridiron Uniform Database.

The uniform graphics you see here are courtesy of The Gridiron Uniform Database. If you’ve never paid their site a visit, stop what you’re doing right now and check it out. Best site on the Internet and an invaluable resource to uniform nerds and casuals alike.

Coming Attractions.

Keep an eye out for the Week 6 full slate breakdown to drop Sunday morning. Because we live in a world without an NFL uniform scheduling czar, we’re at the mercy of the teams deciding and announcing their uniform combos each week. Where it’s not 100% clear before posting, I’ll make a best guess and update after the fact for posterity.

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