Week 2. Where we all overreact to what happened in Week 1 and get burned twice over. Every year, I tell myself that next year I'll skip Week 1 and apply my preseason thoughts to Week 2. And every year I forget.

Let's hope we're as lucky as Patrick Mahomes and the Chiefs this week. If we pick winners as well Asante Samuel drops interceptions, we'll be cooking with gas.

Another solid slate this week. And clear cut winners for best and worst matchups of the week. Let's dive in.

A quick note on methodology.

As always, I’m analyzing every NFL uniform matchup and picking a winner against the spread based on who dresses best. And just because a team’s wardrobe is ranked higher in the Power Rankings doesn’t mean that it will automatically win the uniform matchup. It’s what you wear in the instant matchup that counts.

I’ll also be crowning the best matchup of the week and shaming the worst matchup of the week. It's the over for the sharpest matchup and the under for the dullest.

And don’t forget the Triple Mismatch Club. I’m making three units plays whenever the best dressed team in the matchup is a member of the Club (different colored helmet, jersey, and pants). And nine units plays if both members of the week’s best matchup are members.

Keep an eye out for a “NOTE” here and there where teams have not fully unveiled what they will be wearing before the writing of this issue. I’ll make my best guess as to their outfit, and it won’t affect my ability to pick a winner. I’ll also try to update after the fact if possible so each weekly issue can be a reference point for what a team wore on a given week.

Week 2 Uniform Matchups and Picks.

We've got a battle of two teams running back their Week 1 looks. I love this Browns uniform. It's easily on the shortlist for best individual outfit in the league. And it's a Triple Mismatch Club member to boot. The Jets uniform? Not so much. Maybe they can do another redesign to usher in the inevitable new era of Jets football in 1-3 years.

With all due respect to Joe Flacco, who put together one of the great postseason runs in NFL history, why is Mike White not getting the start here? The dude briefly caught lightning in a bottle last year. What do the Jets have to lose? Let the young man sling it. My big takeaway from the Browns* last week is that this is one of the best teams in football if you take away the quarterback position. I'm not saying I expect them to keep up their winning ways with Jacoby Brissett under center. However, it wouldn't shock me if he steers them to .500 or slightly better. Another good spot this week against the reeling Jets.

*It's only been one week, but we're off to a good start for the surprise Bets Dressed playoff teams: Browns, Bears, Giants, and Steelers all winners last week.

The Pick: Browns -6 (-110)

Triple Mismatch Club 3x Play

While the burgundy and Honolulu blue play well off each other, the positives in this one end there. The Commanders wardrobe is a crime scene but even they have a better number font than the Lions. This is one I'd rather forget.

The Commanders and Carson Wentz got it done Week 1 against the Jaguars. And the Lions rallied late against the Eagles but couldn't overcome the early deficit. It looks like both of these teams will be competitive this season but are likely on the outside looking in for the playoff picture. The Lions can't afford to go 0-2 with two home games to start the season, so it's now or never time for Dan Campbell and the boys.

The Pick: Lions -1.5 (-110)

NOTE - The Commanders have yet to unveil whether they'll wear burgundy or white pants.

UPDATE - Burgundy pants for the Commanders.

While this may not be a contender for best matchup of the week, I'm really digging this one. The Steelers look is excellent, and my only nitpick is a preference for block numerals over the current italic font (and gray facemasks if all my wishes were granted). And I enjoy aspects of the Patriots uniform. The Pat the Patriot look is a Hall of Famer, but I'm still a fan of the Flying Elvis logo. And until we see gray pants in action, this is the best non-Pat the Patriot outfit in their wardrobe. But the matchup easily goes to the Steelers.

It can't get much worse on the field for the Patriots than it did in Week 1. I refuse to put the nail in their coffin this early and still believe they're going to turn things around. But the ugliness against Miami was undeniable. The Steelers pulled a rabbit out of their hat against the Bengals. You know what they say: nothing is certain in life except death, taxes, and Mike Tomlin keeping the Steelers competitive regardless of who's on the roster.

The Pick: Steelers +2.5 (-110)

I don't have much to say about this one. I have generally positive feelings about both outfits. But this is far from best matchup material. The Panthers microscopic shoulder numbers will always drive me nuts, and I really miss gray pants for the Giants. But all things considered, it's hard to be too critical.

Watching Saquon Barkley have his John Wick "yeah, I'm thinking I'm back" moment was a true delight. The Saquonaissance is upon us. And Brian Daboll was no shrinking violet. His two point conversion call was the coaching decision of the week and gave the Giants the win. The Panthers couldn't get it done against Baker's old team. And I'm not so sure they fare much better here.

The Pick: Giants -2 (-110)

From white to black, the Saints are going back to back unitards to start the season. And this matchup is best defined as "bleh". The white over pewter outfit for the Bucs is sharp, but the Saints just don't do it for me. The gold collar on the black jersey is especially jarring.

The story of the game is whether Tom Brady can get the Saints regular season monkey off his back. I'm glad the uniform gods have steered me toward Brady and the Bucs here because I think he is due.

The Pick: Buccaneers -2.5 (-110)

While I'm not a big fan of the Dolphins uniforms, I'm liking this matchup. The aqua and purple play off each other nicely. And the Ravens purple over white getup is one of my sneaky favorites. While this isn't a threat to win best matchup of the week, it's one I'm looking forward to seeing on the screen.

The Ravens will be out for revenge after a 22-10 loss in Miami last season. I expect a big day for Lamar Jackson. But Mike McDaniel (aka Mikey Monk Straps) is the Bets Dressed Coach of the Year pick, so let's see if he can keep his undefeated coaching career going. I think the Ravens make a big statement and clear the number comfortably.

The Pick: Ravens -3.5 (-105)

Triple Mismatch Club 3x Play

The good. The bad. And the ugly. The good: those glorious Colts uniforms. The bad and the ugly: those almost entirely teal-less Jaguars uniforms. Matchup decisions don't get much easier than this. Colts in a landslide.

Back to back road favorite situations for the Colts against division rivals. I highly doubt this one will end in another tie. But the high hopes for the Colts will be called into question with an 0-1-1 start against the Texans and Jaguars. I think the Colts right the ship and take care of business. But this year's Jaguars are much friskier than last year's Jaguars. Tread carefully.

The Pick: Colts -3 (-110)

One of the worst uniforms in the league facing off against one of the best uniforms in the league. Raiders over Cardinals may be my easiest uniform decision of the season.

The most interesting thing here is which 2021 playoff team winds up starting 0-2. If you start 0-2 in the NFL, you have about a 10% chance of making the playoffs. Stated differently, the loser of this one will have one steep climb to get back to the postseason. The Raiders gave the Chargers a decent fight in Week 1, but the Cardinals didn't have a prayer against the hyper-efficient Chiefs. This feels like the Raiders game to lose.

The Pick: Raiders -5 (-110)

NOTE - The Cardinals have yet to unveil whether they'll wear white or red pants. They did not wear red pants with white jerseys at all last season.

UPDATE - White pants for the Cardinals.

This is my favorite outfit in the Broncos wardrobe. But I must admit, each week that passes has me more and more convinced that it's time for a change. The Broncos have had a great deal of Super Bowl winning success with this look. But a new era in Broncos football is upon us, and it's time for the uniforms to follow suit (pun intended). Speaking of uniform changes, the Texans continue to underwhelm and are also desperately in need of a redesign. I'm hereby dubbing this one the "You Should Go Change" Bowl. With that said, Broncos have the edge.

The Nathaniel Hackett field goal decision is one of the more perplexing coaching decisions I've seen in a long time. You can't convince me that the plan of action was to get McManus in position for a 64 yard field goal on the road in Seattle in one of the hardest-to-kick-in stadiums in the league. That was a deer in the headlights moment if I've ever seen one. However, I expect a major bounce back from the Broncos this week. Hackett and Russell Wilson were embarrassed on national television. Enter the Texans as a perfect get-right opponent.

The Pick: Broncos -10 (-110)

Triple Mismatch Club 3x Play

This one was flirting with best matchup of the week until I saw the Bengals would be going black over black. Of all their outfits, this may be my least favorite. White pants pair with the black jersey so perfectly, offering just the right amount of contrast (especially with the fantastic pop of color with the orange helmet). My love of the Cowboys primary white uniform is well documented, and it's the choice here.

Can't say I'm too crazy about the position the uniform gods are putting us in here. This feels like a bounce back spot for the Bengals against the Dak-less Cowboys. But even so, that's a lot of points to lay on the road. If the Bengals Week 1 offensive line play continues into Week 2, Micah Parsons and the rest of the Dallas front could be in for a big day. And if the Cowboys can keep this one within a touchdown, we're in business.

The Pick: Cowboys +7 (-105)

Triple Mismatch Club 3x Play

We've got another easy decision on our hands. The 49ers have one of the best uniforms in the league, and the Seahawks seek to drown us in a sea of navy, neon highlights, and obnoxious patterns, paneling, and striping. 49ers in a landslide.

Speaking of landslide, the 49ers are massive favorites in this one despite being the only team in this game to lose last week. Hopefully Trey Lance and the Niners offense don't have to play this one on a lake. In all seriousness, I expect Lance to bounce back this week. But none of that will matter if Geno Smith and the Seahawks defense bring their best game again this week.

The Pick: 49ers -9 (-110)

I sense a disturbance in the force. The Bills boast one of the finest uniform wardrobes in the league, but they're becoming awfully infatuated with the blue unitard option. I'm never one to mess with good juju*, so I can't fault the Bills wearing this outfit so long as they keep winning in it. My thoughts on the train wreck Titans uniforms are well known. At least the uniform gods are steering me to side with the buzzsaw Bills this week.

I still can't get over the Bills absolutely dismantling the defending champs last week. As for the Titans, I can't say I'm all that surprised they blew it against the Giants. The defending AFC one seed doesn't feel like it has the horses this season. But maybe they'll prove me wrong on Monday night; they always play tough** against the Bills.

*As for bad JuJu, I won't be placing any more prop bets on JuJu Smith-Schuster after his three catch dud against the Chargers.

**Insert Derrick Henry stiff arm GIF here.

The Pick: Bills -10 (-105)

While both of these uniform wardrobes are in the bottom half of the Power Rankings, they each feature one of the best helmet logos in the NFL. The Viking horn and the Eagle wing are iconic. But both of these teams fell in our "Wasted Talent" tier because they're leaving so much potential on the table. This is a tough one to call. I have it as a virtual tie. As such, I'm going to lean on the Power Rankings and give the slightest of edges to the Vikings.

Now that Chargers and Chiefs game is over, this may be the best pure football game left on the Week 2 slate. The high ceilings for both teams were on display in Week 1, and the winner will be sitting pretty at 2-0 with early pole position in the NFC race. The Eagles defense seemed to struggle a bit against the Lions, and I don't see how they'll have any answer for Justin Jefferson.

The Pick: Vikings +2.5 (-110)

NOTE - The Vikings have yet to unveil whether they'll wear purple or white pants.

UPDATE - White pants for the Vikings.

Worst NFL Uniform Matchup of Week 2.

Woof. The Rams deserve a ton of credit for upgrading their fantastic white uniforms to primary status. But they should continue to be shamed whenever they break out the bone grays. I'm a big believer in "no half measures". Just scrap the grays altogether; use the extra alternate slots for a yellow jersey option and a white/navy throwback option. My eyes roll whenever I see the Falcons number font or the giant "ATL" plastered across the front of the jersey. This is an easy pick for worst matchup of the week.

As for the action on the field, I think the Falcons are going to put forth a performance worthy of their dreadful threads. The Rams were embarrassed on national television last week. It'll be time to remind everyone that the champs are not to be forgotten this season.

The Pick: Under 46.5 (-115)

NOTE - The Falcons have yet to unveil whether they'll wear white or black pants.

UPDATE - Black pants for the Falcons.

Best NFL Uniform Matchup of Week 2.

This week's choice is as clear as it gets. Nothing to overthink. Just two stone cold NFL classics squaring off at Lambeau Field. When you factor in the history and how perfectly complementary these two outfits are, it's hard to see this matchup ever not being featured as the best of the week.

Who had the 1-0 Bears visiting the 0-1 Packers on their 2022 NFL bingo card? Last week's Bears victory over the 49ers was your friendly reminder of the following: Week 1 is always nuts; on any given Sunday, any team can beat any other team; and never fight a land war in Asia water war at Soldier Field. I think expectations firmly align back with reality this week, and the Packers silence the many emerging doubters. But for our purposes, we're just rooting for points, points, and more points.

The Pick: Over 41.5 (-110)

The Gridiron Uniform Database.

The uniform graphics you see here are courtesy of The Gridiron Uniform Database. If you’ve never paid their site a visit, stop what you’re doing right now and check it out. It is my favorite site on the Internet and an invaluable resource to uniform nerds and casual fans alike. This is especially the case during the season. I check the site multiple times a day to keep tabs on who’s wearing what.

Drop me a line.

You can always find me on Twitter at NFL Fashion Advice (@fashion_nfl) or via email at [email protected]. Come talk uniforms and all things football, and let me know what you think of the newsletter.

Coming Attractions.

We’ll be back on Thursday to kick off Week 3 with the Thursday Night Football Uniform Matchup plus some Single Digit Revolution fantasy plays. Until then, soak up all of the aesthetic goodness of Week 2 (and bring shades for the rest).

Be sure to subscribe and share this newsletter far and wide.

And always remember: Look Good. Feel Good. Pay Good.